everything that resonates with your higher self is not always reachable and sometimes left behind the noise of the everyday life. but isn't everyday life there our whole life? in this blog post i am going to touch on the importance of observing, forgiving and healing yourself.
of course, some people take notes of their behaviour, while others don't. they simply believe that "who they are" has nothing to do with their patterns and their impact on other people's lives. not everything is black and white, and obviously, your reality isn't everyone else's, but being in touch with yourself in the first place, in my value system, is of utmost importance. it says a lot about the person you are and how open minded your psyche is, cause the reality of things is we are changing and evolving as we grow older. therefore, how can you better something without studying it and its patterns, traumas and most importantly how it behaves on a daily basis.
in this line of thoughts, it's safe to say that every day life takes the best of you. and that can have both a negative, and a positive connotation behind it, depending on how you handle your personality. because it all comes down to you: if you either let the ordinary take or give your best.
how to start observing yourself
the good news is that none of these steps need to happen all at once. try one, sit with it, and add the next when you feel ready. it's a practice, not a performance.
- morning reflection journal — spend five minutes each morning writing what you plan to do, and what your intentions are for the day and your behaviour
- mindful pauses — take short breaks throughout the day to pay attention to your thoughts, body posture, and emotions.
- habit tracker — use a simple chart or app to track small daily habits you're trying to build or change.
- evaluate triggers and rewards — observe what triggers certain behaviours and what rewards or outcomes follow.
- evening self-check — before bed, note three things you did well, and one thing you'd like to improve tomorrow.
- gratitude or learning note — end the day with five things you're grateful for or a lesson you learned.
this may seem totally unrealistic to some people and i totally get it. my advice is — since i've gathered all these habits of tracking my behaviour gradually through time — try each step one at a time. try either the 1st, the 5th, or the 3rd, or whatever resonates with you first. it takes practice, but once you feel ready, even though sometimes we're never really ready, move into the next one. the most important thing: don't do all of them at once. it will be overwhelming and that's not the point.
practically, you can come up with your own template for daily journalling or habit tracking — and that is exactly the point. it doesn't need to look like mine. i’ve actually been working on something but you will be hearing about it soon, I hope.
then comes the forgiveness
the hardest part. i was wondering whether to include it in this post, but i feel like for me this is the most important step, because it is the one that kept me going. what i mean is: you may be motivated to do all of the above, then lose interest, then start again — and all because of the battle in your mind between fast and slow dopamine, the latter being derived from observing and fixing your mistakes.
in the end of the day you may ask for forgiveness from the universe, god, or whatever you choose to believe in — but before that, i feel like you have to forgive yourself.
i see it more as a practice that is about taking care of your inner child, which i have a separate blog post about that you can read here. meaning that you realise you do it all for that little version of you that still believes in you and your love for them. however, it is also the simple acceptance of one's actions and making peace with them, and trying to do your best afterwards.
let's say you haven't been as present, or have been spending too much time on your phone, and you want to change that. at the end of the day you feel bad about it. instead of feeling like that, try and see what that mindless habit had to replace — is it avoiding an uncomfortable thought? validate it. give yourself the space to realise that by blaming and hating on yourself, nothing good is going to come out of it. it was your ego playing for you, not your highest self. seek forgiveness from yourself and from the higher source. then comes peace, and the readiness to try and do.
and then — healing
for some people, that means therapy or working with a psychologist — something i’ve also done, but not extensively. at one point, especially around 2020, i found a different kind of support in simply observing my own thoughts and sitting with them. that shift alone created space for me to understand myself better.
that’s where shadow work comes in.
it’s the process of turning towards the parts of yourself that feel uncomfortable, hidden, or unfamiliar. it means asking yourself questions you’ve been avoiding and going into inner spaces you didn’t have the courage to explore before. you don’t need a perfect system to start — sometimes curiosity is enough.
journaling becomes one of the most accessible ways to do this.
you let your thoughts flow freely — from your mind onto the page, without filtering or overthinking. whether the moment is intense or calm, something shifts once you write it down. there’s a sense of release and mental clarity that builds over time.
i don’t do it perfectly or every single day.
but i keep a notebook where i write my intentions, my direction, and later reflect on how i showed up. that small structure helps me stay aware without feeling overwhelmed.
and somewhere in that process, something important happens.
when you put your experiences into words — what happened, how you felt, how you reacted — you begin to see your reality more clearly. you start noticing patterns, gaps, and things you previously ignored. and naturally, one question follows:
is this reality actually working for me?
p.s.
recently, i came across a bulgarian brand that creates leather notebooks with refillable inserts, and i honestly think it’s such a cool concept. instead of constantly switching notebooks, you keep the same one and just replace the inside, which makes the whole process feel more intentional and personal. and also you can add up to three different types of fillers in one journal.
they are called Note-it. And you can get them from here.
there’s something about having a physical object that stays with you over time, while everything inside it evolves with you. it makes journaling feel less like a task and more like a long-term relationship with yourself.